Death Wish?

I read through Philippians this morning. I didn't even get through the first chapter before I was hit with something huge. In verses 23 and 24 of chapter 1, Paul says this:

"I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account."

Sure, hundreds of times through high school I sang the words "better is one day in Your courts, better is one day in Your house, better is one day in Your courts than thousands elsewhere," but never once did I truly wish my time on this earth was over so that I could go to be with my Savior in heaven. I still haven't truly had that thought. There are times that life deals me 2-7 off-suit and I have the thought that it would be easier if Jesus just came back, but never in my heart of hearts have I truly been ready to go. How does one get a faith like that of Paul? One that says, "I wish I could go now, I wish I could be with my Lord, but I will stay only to do His work." I want that faith.